When You Pray to End Abortion, Pray for the Mothers and Fathers Too

Opinion   Father Frank Pavone   Oct 16, 2018   |   3:35PM    Washington, DC

How do we “pray to end abortion?” There are very specific contours to this multi-faceted intention, and in this fifth part of this series, we continue to explore what they are.

When we pray to end abortion, we are praying for various groups of specific people, starting with the child, as we’ve discussed previously, and continuing with the mother.

We pray against the darkness of ignorance that is imposed on her. We pray for the awareness of who the baby is, and for the awareness of what abortion does to that baby. There is an ignorance, a darkness that is imposed upon the mother and everyone else involved. The abortion industry doesn’t want to tell her the baby is alive, that the baby is a baby, that the baby feels pain. It doesn’t want to tell her that there are risks and dangers to the procedure, like infertility and other kinds of physical and psychological harm. They don’t want to tell her that there are alternatives to abortion.

There’s a war going on between knowledge and ignorance. Laws have been passed in various states to make sure that that woman is told about some of the risks of the procedures, and the development of the baby, and the alternatives to abortion. But the pro-abortion people fight against those laws. So when we pray for the mother and we pray for an end to abortion, we’re praying for the victory of knowledge and awareness over the darkness of ignorance that is imposed on her.

We’re also praying specifically for the fathers. I have spoken so often to the fathers outside of the abortion mills. And so many times, lives are saved at these abortion facilities when the father realizes that his son or daughter is about to be killed, that he is the father, and therefore the protector. Many fathers, upon realizing that, go in and take the mother out of there. They begin to realize it is a mistake to tell her, “Well, this is your choice, your personal, private decision. I’ll respect that.” This message is not helpful for her to hear because it makes her feel isolated rather than assisted. It makes her feel like she can’t handle it rather than she can.

Instead, we want fathers to go back in there and shift that dynamic and say, “Take my hand. We’re getting out of here, and we’re going to find a solution that’s good for you and us, and the child. It doesn’t mean we have to get married. It doesn’t mean anything other than we’re going to let this child be born, and we are going to work this out by taking the help that others are ready to provide us!”

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So to pray that fathers be men, that they be the protectors and providers God has made them to be even if that sexual encounter should have never taken place. That is past history and is beside the point once the child is conceived. Now the child exists, and the father’s responsibilities kick in, moral and otherwise. So we pray that the fathers will have the strength to see and to do what is right.

We also pray also for the other family members because the grandparents of that baby – both the parents of the mom and the parents of the dad  — often have a key role if they are in the picture at all. Sometimes, they’re the ones pushing for the abortion, or sometimes they are the ones who are not stepping up to the plate. Maybe they know about it, and they’re not intervening or they’re not intervening strongly enough. Of course, there are those that never even are told about it until it’s too late.

But for those who are aware, for those who are told, we must pray. First of all, for the ones that are pushing for the abortion, we pray for their repentance. We pray that they stop pushing sin upon their son or daughter and pushing death upon their grandchild. They need to go in the opposite direction. That is our prayer for these grandparents. And for those who are opposed to the abortion but are afraid to say or do anything, we pray, again, for that courage, that boldness, to realize that this is your grandchild. You need to defend this life, and get that dad, get that mom into some good conversations with pregnancy center counselors and others who can help, and give them the courage to say yes to life!

We pray also for the other relatives. There may be aunts, uncles, cousins, other relatives involved. The same dynamic applies. Pray that everyone who knows about it will have the courage to step up to the plate to stop these abortions. We pray for the friends. Sometimes, friends feel like to be loyal to their friend, they have to help them get the abortion. Friends don’t let friends drive drunk, and friends don’t let friends get abortions. This is something we pray for very, very strongly for the friends.

We will consider other dimensions of the intention “pray to end abortion” in the next and final part of this series.