Saundra Adams’ wish to have her grandson Chancellor get to know his incarcerated father may come true, but not in the way that she expected.
After 18 years of denial, former NFL player Rae Carruth finally apologized in a letter for initiating the murder of his then-pregnant girlfriend, Cherica Adams, Crimeonline.com reports. He now wants custody of his son, Chancellor, who has cerebral palsy because of the murder and his traumatic birth, according to the report.
Carruth penned the letter from his jail cell as his scheduled release on Oct. 22 of this year draws near. He told WBTV the reason for his letter: “I’m apologizing for the loss of her daughter. I’m apologizing for the impairment of my son. I feel responsible for everything that happened. And I just want her to know that truly I am sorry for everything.”
But then he continued: “I should be raising my son. His mother should be raising her son. Ms. Adams should not be doing this and I want that responsibility back. I feel like he might not ever have his mother in his life but he could still have me and I could still make a difference and I don’t think that’s anyone’s responsibility when I’m still here.”
Saundra Adams has cared for Chancellor since his birth, and described the joy he brings to her and to his community. “He wakes up smiling and he goes to bed smiling. He’s had that same happy spirit his whole life,” she said.
Adams forgave Carruth. According to the Charlotte Observer, she said: “The main reason I want Rae and Chancellor to one day have a relationship is because (Chancellor) is his son. And that’s why I chose early on that I would forgive Rae. Because I don’t feel like I can offer unconditional love to Chancellor if I don’t forgive Rae. That’s his father. It’s a part of him. Chancellor wouldn’t be who he is without Rae. I want them to bond, or at least to meet again.”
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However, Adams doesn’t believe that forgiveness dictates that she should relinquish Chancellor’s custody to one she describes as “a stranger.” She said, “I’ve forgiven Rae already, but to have any type of relationship with him, there does have to be some repentance.”
“And I think this opens the door. But I can say definitively he’s not ever going to have custody of Chancellor. Chancellor will be raised either by me or, after I’m gone, by someone else who loves him and who knows him. He will never be raised by a stranger – someone he doesn’t know and who tried to kill him,” she continued.
Carruth was incarcerated for hiring a hitman to murder Cherica Adams in 1999, as LifeNews previously reported. The alleged reason is that Carruth did not want to pay child support and had urged Cherica Adams to have an abortion, a proposal that she refused.