Kelsey Kurtinitis, like so many other mothers who have experienced the grief of miscarriage, felt outraged when she saw Planned Parenthood compare miscarrying a child to abortion.
Planned Parenthood’s comparison was based on a recent article by pro-abortion writer Danielle Campamor who described the heartbreak she felt while going through a recent miscarriage. Campamor, who miscarried three unborn babies and aborted another, described miscarriage and abortion as “sisters.” The abortion chain Planned Parenthood promoted her article online, and a massive backlash from pro-life women who also have suffered miscarriages followed.
“As a woman who has endured the heartbreak of a miscarriage, I can’t express how shocked and insulted I was by the absurdity of the comparison,” Kurtinitis wrote. “How dare she imply that the loss of a child through an act of nature is similar to a mindful choice to kill a baby in the womb?”
Writing for The Liberty Conservative, Kurtinitis described the pain and grief she felt after she miscarried her unborn child six weeks into pregnancy.
Kurtinitis said she miscarried her unborn baby when she was just 17 years old. A frightened teenager, she said her heart broke as she lay on the ultrasound table and heard the technician tell her that they could not find a heartbeat.
Though she was young, Kurtinitis said she never considered aborting her unborn baby; and she grieved the loss of her child for months. Even now, she said she still feels the pain of her child’s death.
“It felt as if all the light in my world had been sucked out,” she wrote. “I had already imagined what he or she would look like, their newborn smell, the baby giggles, first steps and bicycle rides, working on homework together.”
Kurtinitis said her child’s future was a potential but her child’s life was already very real. From the moment of conception, he or she already was a unique, living human being with all the “special little traits that would make that future possible,” she wrote.
If I’m honest, the pain of losing a child is the lingering kind. I don’t know that it ever fully goes away.
But I don’t think that it’s supposed to.
The loss of human life is tragic, regardless of the surrounding circumstances. This is something we just innately know. We feel it. There’s something ugly, tragic, and wrong about death, and nobody needs that wrongness explained.
There is a very big difference between miscarriage and abortion. To suggest such a thing is extremely hurtful to millions of women who had no choice in their unborn babies’ deaths.
And that is exactly why miscarriage and abortion are different – choice. A woman who loses an unborn baby to miscarriage does not choose for her child to die. In many women’s eyes, a miscarriage is similar to having a born child dying of natural causes. Some families even hold funerals for babies who they have miscarried.
An abortion, on the other hand, is a woman’s choice to end her unborn baby’s life. In abortion cases, the intent is to end the baby’s life. On purpose.
“Most women who have miscarried loved their babies and were prepared to make sacrifices for them,” Kurtinitis said. “Whether they were planning to raise the child themselves or to utilize adoptive services, both choices would have been an act of selfless love – something an abortion can never be.”