Mother of 4 Defends Having an Abortion “Who are You to Judge?”

Opinion   |   Micaiah Bilger   |   Apr 7, 2017   |   6:18PM   |   Washington, DC

It’s difficult to understand how a woman could defend legalized abortion after having a brutally painful abortion experience that has haunted her for more than a decade.

But that’s what Australian blogger and mother of four (five, counting her aborted child) Stevie Niki did recently.

“Do I regret my abortion? Yes, I guess I do but would I change it if I could? Probably not, because everything I have done has made me who I am today,” she said, according to the Daily Mail.

“Do I think about the child I chose to let go? Often, more often than I care to admit. I wonder who they would have been but I also like to think maybe it just wasn’t their time and that they’re here with me now in one of my others in some small way.”

Reading her story, one can’t help but wonder if she and her unborn child would have been spared pain and death if more people had supported her and her child.

Young and vulnerable, Niki said she became pregnant at age 17 while she and her boyfriend (now husband) still were in school and jobless.

“He was so excited about the baby, but I had so many mixed emotions,” she said. “The logical part of me, and the woman I was becoming knew neither of us had jobs nor did we have our own house so how could we afford to provide for a child when we could barely support ourselves?”

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Niki said her mother and sister helped her to come to the conclusion that she should have an abortion. She didn’t want to tell her dad or disappoint him with the news that she was pregnant at so young an age.

She said her boyfriend “hated her for” having the abortion at the time, and it’s hard not to wonder what her father would have thought if he had known about the unborn child.

She said the abortion was a terrible experience, and she felt so “scared and alone.”

“They sat me in a room and asked me questions, gave me an ultrasound where for the first, last and only time I saw my baby and I began to tear up,” she said. 

After the abortion clinic destroyed her unborn baby’s life, they turned Niki out without any follow-up care or counseling.

Niki said her abortion was a “hard choice,” but it’s one she wants every woman to be able to make.

She wrote:

‘I want to break the stigma and lift the taboo on talking about abortion because I know there are so many people like me and others I know who have been put in a position where they had to make this hard choice, and it has not made them any less of the amazing people that they are.

‘Women who have had abortions because they suffered at the hands of domestic violence – who is anyone to judge a person for making a decision that will prevent a child growing up in an abusive home?

‘Love, empower and encourage the women around you because you don’t know what they’re going through or been through.’

No woman should have to go through the pain and trauma that Niki went through. Nor should any child in the womb.

Telling a woman that all her problems will be solved by killing her unborn child is wrong. And it’s lazy. It’s the easy way out for the rest of society, not for the woman or her child. Millions of children are dead, and millions of parents are damaged by abortion every year because society takes the easy way out. It pushes women to abort their unborn babies and then abandons them, rather than offering to stick by the mom and child for the long run.

Women deserve better than abortion, just as their babies do. They deserve to be loved and supported and empowered, as Niki said – but killing an innocent human being is not the way to do it.