Because of Abortion, Not All Dads Can Celebrate Father’s Day

Opinion   |   Brad Mattes   |   Jun 15, 2012   |   4:21PM   |   Washington, DC

As a father and now grandfather, I have entered an era of my life that’s blessed me with a profound respect for the significance of Father’s Day.

And with over 37 years in the pro-life movement, I also hold a deep reverence for the millions of children lost and the men who were unable or unwilling to embrace fatherhood. As incomprehensible at it seems, since Roe v. Wade the United States has literally exterminated a generation, one by one, through the horrendous act of abortion. It’s hard not to reflect on how many lives—children, women and men—have been devastated as a result.

On June 8th, the Kansas City Star included this poignant question in its column, Ask Mr. Dad. A young man wrote:

“Dear Mr. Dad: My girlfriend is pregnant. We’d talked about having children someday, but hadn’t expected it would happen so soon. She wants to terminate the pregnancy. But all of a sudden I’m feeling very depressed. I really want to be a dad and her decision is going to put an end to that dream, at least for awhile. I’ve always thought of myself as pro-choice, but now that the decision affects me, I’m not so sure.”

Just think about how this man’s view had been shaped by the manufactured lie that abortion is “a woman’s choice.” Now, he’s faced with the truth. It is not merely a “choice,” it’s a real life. And the decision to end that life has repercussions extending far beyond just the woman and the baby she carries. Let’s hope and pray that both he and his girlfriend are able to realize the devastating implications of killing their unborn child and choose life before it is too late.

Sadly, for many men, Father’s Day is a painful reminder of a dreadful act. While society, government and the media all tout abortion as “a woman’s right,” men aren’t even considered as an afterthought. It may not be publically acknowledged; however the anguish of men who’ve lost a child to abortion is horrifyingly real.

Wrestling with feelings of guilt, inadequacy and anger can be overwhelming and at worst, result in harmful and self-destructive behavior. Yet tragically, many never realize that the pain invading their hearts and minds is the result of abortion. That’s why it’s critical we address this issue with men beforehand, as well as after an abortive experience in their lives. The resource, Men and Abortion – An Overview is helpful as it explains in detail why abortion is devastating to men and how to help someone through this crisis. This and many other resources, including counselors, can be found at our site



There are blessings that have emerged out of these shattered lives. Some men have found a way through the darkness of grief that surrounds those who’ve lost a child to abortion. They have discovered the power of forgiveness and are using their experiences to reach out to other men and promote a culture of life. Three of these brave men tell their stories in a powerful episode of Facing Life Head-On entitled, Men Hurt, Too.

One man is a firefighter; the other is a movie producer and there is even a father of twelve. It just goes to show that we never know who may have faced abortion in their lifetime. In recognition of Father’s Day, I encourage you to share this touching video with those you know. May we continue to dedicate ourselves to saving the lives of sons, daughters, mothers and fathers in this generation and those to come!

Wishing you a blessed Father’s Day. Note: Bradley Mattes is the executive director of Life Issues Institute, a national pro-life educational group.