Advice Columnist Urges Woman to Stay With Boyfriend Who Suggested Abortion

National   |   Steven Ertelt   |   Nov 15, 2004   |   9:00AM   |   WASHINGTON, DC

Advice Columnist Urges Woman to Stay With Boyfriend Who Suggested Abortion

Email this article
Printer friendly page

by Maria Vitale Gallagher Staff Writer
November 15, 2004

Chicago, IL ( — A Chicago Tribune columnist is catching fire for recommending that a mother take her 22-year-old daughter to an office of Planned Parenthood, the nation’s largest abortion operation.

Advice guru Amy Dickinson went so far as to suggest that the mother drive her adult daughter to Planned Parenthood and stay in the waiting room during her consultation. The daughter has a two-year-old son and recently miscarried another child.

Dickinson wrote, “I think that a young woman who at 22 has already had at least one unplanned pregnancy needs to reassess her behavior — and her birth-control method."

"Because her pregnancies have such a huge impact on you, you might want to drive her to Planned Parenthood and wait in the waiting room while she has her consult," Dickinson added. "Then you might want to take her to the drugstore and wait with her while she gets her prescription filled."

Dickinson also recommended that the young woman continue to see her boyfriend if she wished — even though he had suggested aborting the child that she ultimately miscarried.

The columnist wrote, “If your daughter is a happy, healthy, responsible mother and fully functioning adult, I’m of a mind that she should be in charge of her own sexual life.”

In her letter requesting advice, the mother of the young woman had written, "Our daughter looked into adoption and even had her aunt and uncle lined up as prospective parents, but then she miscarried. Now this guy is still lurking in her life. She calls him an ‘FWB’ — friend with benefits. In my opinion, a man who doesn’t want to be a father has no business seeing a woman who already has a child, let alone be a ‘FWB’ and risk an additional pregnancy."

Pro-life activists have expressed exasperation in the past with advice columnists who direct women to Planned Parenthood, given the organization’s track record. Abortions far outnumber adoptions at Planned Parenthood facilities.

In a column in November 2003, "Dear Abby" recommended that a young pregnant woman who professed to being "Alone and Terrified" report to Planned Parenthood for counseling without advising her parents of her pregnancy.

A number of readers questioned the wisdom of Abby’s advice and she eventually devoted an entire column to rebutting pro-life objections to her advice.

One reader, Dana S. of Escondido, California, wrote, "Here in California a girl recently died because rather than going to her parents for help, she went to Planned Parenthood. Secrets should never be encouraged. Parents are the teen’s best option."

ACTION: You can contact columnist Amy Dickinson by e-mail at [email protected] or by mail at Ask Amy, Chicago Tribune, TT500, 435 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, IL 60611.

You can also contact the editor of the Tribune at

Related web sites:
See the original advice column Amy Dickinson wrote:,1,6378858.column?coll=chi-homepagenews2-utl