Woman Regretfully Recalls the Horror of Her Abortion: “Then I Hear It, the Evil Vacuum. My Mind Screams No!”

Opinion   |   Micaiah Bilger   |   Sep 20, 2017   |   6:39PM   |   Washington, DC

A woman retold the vivid details of her abortion story Tuesday on Twitter as she mourned the loss of the child who she was pressured to abort.

Pregnant at 16, Twitter user “Mellecon” said she fell in love with her unborn baby quickly after she found out she was pregnant. But her parents and the boyfriend who she thought loved her both pressured, threatened and basically forced her to abort her baby.

Thirty years later, the woman said she still is haunted by the sound of the vacuum that sucked her unborn baby out of her womb. And she deeply regrets not doing more to try to protect her child.

The Blaze reports her powerful and heartbreaking story gained massive attention online. It counteracts the prominent pro-abortion narrative of the day that women need abortions to succeed and few regret having them.

In 1989, the woman said she walked into a Planned Parenthood with a friend, both suspecting that they were pregnant.

“The lady asks us at the desk what we want. Pregnancy tests, we both say at the same time,” she wrote. “We both pay our $10, because PP is not cheap.”

The tests revealed that both she and her friend were pregnant. She said her friend wanted an abortion, but she insisted that she was keeping her baby. The Planned Parenthood nurse informed her that there was nothing more they could do for her – no prenatal care, nothing.

“I rush home, I call the ‘man’ who loves me,” she wrote. “I say ‘we’re pregnant.’ We can be together. He screams in the phone ‘F—, get rid of it.’ Your parents already threatened me with statutory rape charges. This is proof. ‘I don’t want it, and we’re done.’ I’m stunned, but defiant. This is my baby. I can do this. I’m already in love with it. I’ll find [a way].”

Her parents were equally unsupportive. She said her mother called her a “slut” and an embarrassment to the family.

“Me: Then I’ll give the baby up for adoption. My liberal dad snorts,” she continued. “’Nobody wants a mixed baby. Your baby will languish in foster care. Is that what you want?’”

Then they kicked her out of their house. She said she wandered the streets that night, not knowing where to go. Eventually, she went back home hoping that they would let her stay.

“My mother is sitting up,” she wrote. Her mother told her: “’I guess because you’re back it means you’ll do what I say.’ … ‘Oh honey, don’t worry. You won’t have to go to that nasty planned parenthood. We’ll get a doctor to do it at the hospital.’”

The woman said her mother seemed “giddy” at the idea of her daughter having an abortion, but she felt sick to her stomach. Her parents scheduled her abortion when she was about 8 weeks pregnant.

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She said the doctor did not explain the procedure, and the ultrasound technician turned the screen away so she couldn’t see her unborn baby.

“I am brought into a surgical room and given a pill,” she wrote. “The pill makes everything hazy and unreal. My feet are in the stirrups and my mind is racing over all that’s happening. Then I hear it. It sounds like an evil vacuum. And I feel the pressure. My mind screams, ‘No,’ and then I start to scream ‘No, No, No, No, No, No.’ This isn’t right. This isn’t right. This vacuum is killing. It’s sucking the life out of me. I’m killing my baby. ‘No’ I’m sobbing.

“The doctor tells me to quiet down, it will be over soon. I don’t. I can’t,” she continued. “I’m killing someone. Not anyone, but MINE. Again, he assures me it will be over soon. Little did I know, the nightmare for me would never be over. The vacuum continues. I feel violated, more violated than when I was raped 2 years earlier. It’s finally over.”

After they wheeled her out of the room, she said she began screaming and sobbing, “My baby, my baby, my baby.” She said a nurse later told her to “shut up” because she was disturbing the other patients.

“Apparently, I don’t deserve the respect of a patient, and I agree,” she wrote. “I’m scum. I’m a murderer.”

Her aunt who worked at the hospital eventually came in to comfort her, she remembered.

“To this day, she’s the only liberal family member who is pro-life. I have always wondered if that was the moment for her,” she said.

She said she blames herself for not protecting her unborn baby as a mother should. And now every time she hears her children laugh, she remembers the child who she aborted.

“‘You were just a kid,’ people tell me,” she wrote. “I wasn’t though, the moment I became pregnant, I was a mom. And [moms] protect their children no matter what. I failed.

“… Because I was given a ‘choice.’ I love you little one, I always will,” she concluded.