On a hot summer day in June of 2008 Kristi Hofferber decided it was time to talk to her adoptive parents about getting information about her birth parents. Kristi never felt the need to step back into her past, and always felt unsettled about it. But on this hot day in June 2008 she decided to go back in time and what she found out about her birth parents has become the biggest shock of her life.
Kristi was adopted at birth into a loving home and was raised in the Lutheran church. She grew up knowing she was adopted and was the only child for this young married couple out of Illinois. She was never sure why her birthmother placed her up for adoption and was never sure if she ever really wanted to know the reason why.
When Kristi was 13 years old, her adoptive parents read a local newspaper article about a father who had molested his daughter for years and was being charged with rape and molestation of a dependent. The newspaper printed this families name and that’s when Kristis’ parents discovered the truth about Kristis young life. Kristi’s parents were mistakenly given the name of her birth family during the adoption process back in 1978. They decided to keep this information secret until Kristi was old enough to understand and mature enough to handle this kind of information.
For years Kristis’ adoptive parents told her that when she wanted information concerning her birth family, they would sit down with her to discuss it. Kristi was content in her life and didn’t feel the need to revisit her past. It wasn’t until Kristi was 30 years old, after being married with a child of their own, she felt God moving her towards finding out about her birth.
“I tried to talk to my mom and dad lots of times about opening my birth records but I felt like I was disrespecting them in some way so I didn’t”. “When I finally got up enough nerve and they sat me down and told me the truth, I was taken back by what they told me”.
Kristis birth-mother was repeatedly molested by her father and as a result, became pregnant with Kristi. Out of years of abuse and torture, Kristi became the only survivor of 6 children conceived in incest. Four of the pregnancies ended in abortion to hide her fathers crime and one forced miscarriage due to abuse. The abuse went on for almost 20 years until Kristi’s birthmother was strong enough to put an end to it. Kristi’s birthmother/sister finally pressed charges against her father and Kristis birthfather/grandfather went to prison.
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One of the questions Kristi gets asked a lot at the events she speaks at is “do you have any physical abnormalities since you were conceived in incest”? “This makes me laugh because this is why society tells women to abort children conceived in incest”, Kristi says. “Like there is going to be something wrong with their child, like I should be purple with green dots or something”. “I am as normal as anyone in this auditorium, I am not an exception I just have an exceptional story”.
Kristi knows that her life is a gift and she is not only lucky to be alive but blessed to be strong enough to tell her birthmothers/sisters story. Kristi is now speaking out publicly and has joined forces with Pam Stenzel and Monica Kelsey and our organization “Living Exceptions”.
“Living Exceptions” is a non profit organization that is made up of members who are conceived in rape or incest and are educating individuals how to be 100% pro-life with no exceptions. 60% of the pro-life community have a rape/incest exception and Kristi is dedicating her life to educating people in the pro-life movement that being “pro-life” means that all life has value. You can follow Kristi on her pro-life speaker page at www.facebook.com/kristihofferber. To have Kristi speak at your event please use the contact page on www.livingexceptions.com.
